Paralysed by Analysis

I don't really Tweet.

Why?

For real, it is a self centred action.

Narcissism.

I will talk about that later. :)

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It has been three months without posting anything and my last post was all about new work place and clothes.

I have tons of things in my mind but writing them down will take me forever. I always want things to be perfect or else I won't do it. That is probably why I have not done anything great. I mean extremely great because of the mindset of wanting things to be perfect. 

Once, I shared my plans for my life with my immediate superior.

I shared about what are the things that I am planning to do and I closed my sharing with...

"But.... I don't know. Do you think it is a good plan? What if it does not work and I will only waste my time and resources?"

He shut me up. He said. 'Here's the thing. YOU ARE PARALYSED BY ANALYSIS!'

I was ____________. I can't even find a right word for my reaction.

"Yes. You are paralysed by analysis. You are too cautious! You have all of these wonderful ideas and plans but here you are. Not doing anything! You know why? It is because you think too much! You analysed all of the consequences and probabilities and when you find that there is a chance of failure, you hesitate and procrastinate or even trash the idea! The things that you think are might not even real. Yet you are scared to take action! You are paralysed because of your analysis. Stop over analysing and take action! '.

My reply was just ' Okay. I got it! Thank you'.

When I went back home, once again I evaluated myself. I took a deep thought over the phrase.

Yes. I did! I have always been paralysed by analysis. 

There was once, I refused to attend a sponsored training amounting USD $3997.

I refused to attend simply because I had a big project ongoing and stuffing new informations into my brain might distract me from my current job. Besides,  the training was in Kuala Lumpur city and it was during raining season. There were few cases of flash flood during that few days and being caught in flash flood is the last thing I want to happen to my car. Alone in the flood and no one to call for  help. Bearing the costs of repairing the engine, having to rent a car as a replacement for few days until my car restored, or having the problem going to work. I might get harassed while waiting for the rescue.

Do you see how terrible my 'over analysing'? To be honest, I could think up to four layers of backup plan for failure. I mean.. I do think like that for almost all of my actions especially it is meant for something I never try before. Four layers of backup. Who the hell in the world does that???

If there is, please tell me!

Enough with the possibilities of dangers imagination Len.

Do you see that?

How a possession could make you stop from doing good things.

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Alright... about Twitter.

I replied to The Minimalist Guy's tweet simply because I do agree with one of his tweets.

Being quiet does not mean I did not do anything.

Sunway Lagoon - Malaysia

My insanity is certified!

I did Bungy Jump! - 7.7.2013 -

Time management

"The time you enjoy wasting is not wasted time"

 

When I answer 'I don't have time', please bear in mind that I wanted to say 'you are not worth enough of my precious time' in a nicer way. 70% possibility! Because I understand the same meaning when I got 'I don't have time' answer from someone. However, I do respect your priority and I am not offended.

Seriously, I don't believe in 'I don't have time statement'. Everyone is given 24/7. Decide wisely on what and who you want to spend the time with.

 

One more thing... I am not lazy. I just enjoy doing nothing. 

 

Busy or 'I don't have time' is nothing more than excuse and lies that you want to believe.

10 facts about my HOST

Here's some info about my host. The body I am living.

1. Poultry is a no-no for this body.
2. This body can stay awake for more than 24 hours.
3. This body is restless.
4. Anemic and a Thalassemia carrier.
5. Her hand is full of scars.
6. Looks 5 years younger than her age.
7. Her eyes is +200 left, +100 right.
8. Weight 52kg (fat huh?)
9. Height 154cm
10. Laugh inappropriately VERY LOUD.

 

"I am going to make her lean and mean.
I am going to make her a minimalist "

Clothes list

11 Dresses
1 Baju Kurung
1 Baju Kadazan
1 Punjabi Dress1 Shawl
3 Cardigans (royal blue, turquoise and black)
1 Outdoor jacket1 Denim jacket
1 Vest
1 Black Shirt
1 Black Pants
1 Red Blouse
3 Jeans (Black, Blue and Seasoned)
1 Short Pants
3 Workout pants ( white, turquoise, black)
2 Beach pants
2 Sweat pants (long-white, short-green)
1 Zebra pants (will return back to my sister)
12 T-shirts (will return 1 to my sister)
4 Tank Tops
* Occasionally

TOTAL= 52 Clothes

I will make it less than 50!

Extreme minimalist would probably laugh at my list.
However, as for now my state of mind says that I don't want to be an extreme minimalist.
One of the thing that I FEAR in this life is commitment and any sort of restriction (I admitted this on 26 Nov 2012). I hate being attached to anything : almost all things. I did mention about this in my previous blog. No kidding.
Committing to having only 100 things sounds like a commitment to me.
I would stay away from anything that disturbing my peaceful mind.

"We go on multiplying our conveniences only to multiply our cares. We increase our possessions only to the enlargement of our anxieties." Anna C. Brackett

Why I want to be a minimalist?

I have always been longing to have A Simple Happy Life...

Probably since 2004? My host was only 17 years old back then.

She was trapped in a typical cycle of life. Born-School-Work-Breed-Die.

I had a Friendster blog once but my blog died with the death of Friendster and I stopped for a while.

Then I move to BlogSpot in 2008.

In the entry, I did mention;

I am just an ordinary girl who loves shopping. However, I noticed that I have no more space in my house to keep them and hence I stopped buying. I thought of studying hard and become rich and buy a big house to fit all of my stuffs and waste my money buying lots of clothes. But I know I won’t wear most of the clothes. I would still wear my worn out attire out of comfort. Therefore, I better choose to be a moderate in my spending.   [Len 23 Nov 2008]

 

I know this is going to be a big move. A very big change and I don't know how my host's family would react to this changes.. at this point, I am still afraid to say and admit that I want to be a minimalist. Can I do it? Yes! I can and I am doing it! This is what you wanted for your entire life. Gosh!What took me so long to decide and take the step!?

 

Sometimes the smallest step in the right direction  

ends up being the biggest step of your life.

Tip toe of you just but take the step.

.......

“Eyes blinded by the fog of things
cannot see truth.
Ears deafened by the din of things
cannot hear truth.
Brains bewildered by the whirl of things
cannot think truth.
Hearts deadened by the weight of things
cannot feel truth.
Throats choked by the dust of things
cannot speak truth.”

― Harold Bell Wright, The Uncrowned King